Istanbul is more than just a city. The intersection of continents, empires, religions, and daily life is an experience. Standing in front of a 1,500-year-old mosque one moment, and then having tea with a shopkeeper who demands that you try his wife's baklava recipe the next. Despite Istanbul's well-known friendliness, the city's rhythm is governed by unwritten rules.
You must be aware of the unspoken rules if you wish to experience the city as a local and avoid being noticed as a lost tourist. Here's what TripAdvisor won't tell you.
Tea (çay) is more than just a beverage in Istanbul. It serves as a greeting, a handshake, and a means of saying, "Let's slow down." Tea is more than just hospitality when someone offers it to you, whether it's a stranger in a park, the man at the carpet store, or a cab driver. It is ingrained in the culture. Saying "no" too soon can come across as condescending, but you're not required to say yes. A courteous "maybe later" (belki sonra) keeps the door open if you're not sure. Expert advice: Tea is hot, sweet, and strong among the locals. The glass is shaped like a tulip. Never request milk. Here, that is not an issue.
Five times a day, mosques resound with the ezan, or call to prayer. Like ferry horns and seagulls, it is a part of the city's soundscape. Participation is not required, but you should be respectful. It is improper behaviour to talk loudly, play loud music, or take selfies in a mosque courtyard during prayer time. Turn off your phone, remove your shoes, and cover your knees and shoulders when you're in a mosque. Mosques typically provide headscarves at the entrance, and women are expected to wear them inside.
"Abla" means "big sister," and "abi" (pronounced "ah-bee") means "big brother" in Turkish. You can use them with waiters, shopkeepers, strangers, and even the guy who just gave you directions to your hotel.
Things You Need to Know Before Visiting Istanbul
1. Tea Isn’t Optional - It’s a Social Ritual!
Tea (çay) is more than just a beverage in Istanbul. It serves as a greeting, a handshake, and a means of saying, "Let's slow down." Tea is more than just hospitality when someone offers it to you, whether it's a stranger in a park, the man at the carpet store, or a cab driver. It is ingrained in the culture. Saying "no" too soon can come across as condescending, but you're not required to say yes. A courteous "maybe later" (belki sonra) keeps the door open if you're not sure. Expert advice: Tea is hot, sweet, and strong among the locals. The glass is shaped like a tulip. Never request milk. Here, that is not an issue.
2. Respect the Call to Prayer - Even if You're Not Religious
Five times a day, mosques resound with the ezan, or call to prayer. Like ferry horns and seagulls, it is a part of the city's soundscape. Participation is not required, but you should be respectful. It is improper behaviour to talk loudly, play loud music, or take selfies in a mosque courtyard during prayer time. Turn off your phone, remove your shoes, and cover your knees and shoulders when you're in a mosque. Mosques typically provide headscarves at the entrance, and women are expected to wear them inside.
3. Learn These Magic Words: “Abi” and “Abla”
"Abla" means "big sister," and "abi" (pronounced "ah-bee") means "big brother" in Turkish. You can use them with waiters, shopkeepers, strangers, and even the guy who just gave you directions to your hotel.
It's not only courteous; it makes you feel warm right away. These remarks convey that you view them as individuals as well as service providers. See how it softens interactions by giving it a try.
Bargaining is a part of the dance when you're shopping at the Grand Bazaar or in markets like Eminönü. However, don't approach the situation with the mindset of "getting the best deal at any cost." Begin by grinning. Make a counter-offer, but be fair, after asking how much something costs and expressing surprise. The seller will frequently follow up with a better offer if you start to leave. Don't change your mind once a price has been agreed upon. That is regarded as impolite. One golden rule: Avoid haggling in establishments where prices are set, such as supermarkets or contemporary shopping centers.
Istanbul is a city of well-planned chaos; buses occasionally stop wherever they feel like it, ferries don't always run on time, and meals can take longer than anticipated. It adds to the allure. It helps to lower your expectations, whether you're exploring independently or taking one of the many Istanbul guided tours available in Istanbul. Here, people rarely rush through anything, especially not tea, meals, or conversation. Instead, things happen on their own time. You will miss the rhythm that makes Istanbul unique if you attempt to power-walk your way through the city or pack too much into a single day. Reduce your speed. Allow the day to lead you. The best parts of the city are revealed in this way.
Indeed, politics are fierce in Turkey. Indeed, people hold strong beliefs. But as a visitor, don't lead with politics. You can listen if someone brings it up, but proceed with caution. Sensitive subjects include Erdoğan, the Kurdish people, secularism versus religion, and Turkey's place in international politics. Even though locals may have strong opinions about these issues, that doesn't mean you should join in.
They can be seen everywhere: waiting at deli counters as if they own the place, napping on old ruins, and relaxing on café chairs. The street cats of Istanbul are protected and adored. However, they are not pets. Or cuddly toys. Treat them with respect.
4. Haggling Is Expected - But Do It Right
Bargaining is a part of the dance when you're shopping at the Grand Bazaar or in markets like Eminönü. However, don't approach the situation with the mindset of "getting the best deal at any cost." Begin by grinning. Make a counter-offer, but be fair, after asking how much something costs and expressing surprise. The seller will frequently follow up with a better offer if you start to leave. Don't change your mind once a price has been agreed upon. That is regarded as impolite. One golden rule: Avoid haggling in establishments where prices are set, such as supermarkets or contemporary shopping centers.
5. Don’t Rush - This City Doesn’t Run on Your Schedule
Istanbul is a city of well-planned chaos; buses occasionally stop wherever they feel like it, ferries don't always run on time, and meals can take longer than anticipated. It adds to the allure. It helps to lower your expectations, whether you're exploring independently or taking one of the many Istanbul guided tours available in Istanbul. Here, people rarely rush through anything, especially not tea, meals, or conversation. Instead, things happen on their own time. You will miss the rhythm that makes Istanbul unique if you attempt to power-walk your way through the city or pack too much into a single day. Reduce your speed. Allow the day to lead you. The best parts of the city are revealed in this way.
6. Don’t Talk Politics Unless Invited To
Indeed, politics are fierce in Turkey. Indeed, people hold strong beliefs. But as a visitor, don't lead with politics. You can listen if someone brings it up, but proceed with caution. Sensitive subjects include Erdoğan, the Kurdish people, secularism versus religion, and Turkey's place in international politics. Even though locals may have strong opinions about these issues, that doesn't mean you should join in.
7. Don’t Touch Cats. Let Them Decide.
They can be seen everywhere: waiting at deli counters as if they own the place, napping on old ruins, and relaxing on café chairs. The street cats of Istanbul are protected and adored. However, they are not pets. Or cuddly toys. Treat them with respect.
You're lucky if a cat comes up to you. Give them a gentle pat. However, avoid chasing, grabbing, or picking them up. These cats are not your Instagram props; they are free-thinking city dwellers. Here’s how to handle cats in Istanbul:
No one is giving you utensils when you're eating street corn, doner kebabs, or simit (sesame bread rings). It's common for Turkish cuisine to be consumed with your hands. Many foods, such as lahmacun or pide, are best consumed by tearing and scooping, even when dining out. Avoid overanalysing it. Simply do as the locals do. Unless you're eating something obviously handheld with a knife and fork, nobody here is evaluating your table manners.
Frequently, there is no distinct boundary. People may seem to swarm forward at bakeries, banks, or even the airport. However, avoid becoming combative. Locals can tell who arrived first with a sixth sense.
- Let the cat come to you.
- Offer your hand for a sniff before petting.
- Don’t pick them up.
- Don’t feed them anything spicy or salty.
- If you see food/water bowls, don’t disturb them (other than to add to them) - they’re community supported.
8. The Knife-and-Fork Rule: Not Always the Norm
No one is giving you utensils when you're eating street corn, doner kebabs, or simit (sesame bread rings). It's common for Turkish cuisine to be consumed with your hands. Many foods, such as lahmacun or pide, are best consumed by tearing and scooping, even when dining out. Avoid overanalysing it. Simply do as the locals do. Unless you're eating something obviously handheld with a knife and fork, nobody here is evaluating your table manners.
9. Queueing Isn’t a National Sport
Frequently, there is no distinct boundary. People may seem to swarm forward at bakeries, banks, or even the airport. However, avoid becoming combative. Locals can tell who arrived first with a sixth sense.
“Siz en son musunuz?” - “Were you the last one?” - and take your place after them if you aren’t sure. This single sentence eases tension and demonstrates respect.
Indeed, credit cards are widely accepted, particularly in places with a high tourist population. However, cash is frequently preferred by public transportation, street vendors, taxis, and smaller eateries. Carry some Turkish lira with you, particularly for local ferries, public restrooms (which can cost up to 5 TL), and tipping.
Tipping is not a big deal in Istanbul. However, it is valued. It is customary to round up or leave 10% at restaurants. Round up the fare for taxi drivers. Tipping at hammams (Turkish baths) is customary; a minimum of 20 to 30 TL is typically required.
Don’t make a show of tipping. Locals usually leave it discreetly and move on.
In Istanbul, people will go above and beyond to assist you. People will invite you to tea or walk you to your hotel. It's usually sincere. However, remain vigilant. Some overly amiable "guides" or store owners are attempting to persuade you to spend money or make purchases. Have faith in your instincts. If something doesn't feel right, gently say no and leave.
Those who observe more than they intend are rewarded in Istanbul. It's a city of contradictions: chaotic yet friendly, old and new. You are not intended to be constrained by the unspoken rules. They are there to help you experience the city as a visitor, not just a tourist.
10. Cash Is Still King
Indeed, credit cards are widely accepted, particularly in places with a high tourist population. However, cash is frequently preferred by public transportation, street vendors, taxis, and smaller eateries. Carry some Turkish lira with you, particularly for local ferries, public restrooms (which can cost up to 5 TL), and tipping.
11. Tipping Is Subtle - But Appreciated
Tipping is not a big deal in Istanbul. However, it is valued. It is customary to round up or leave 10% at restaurants. Round up the fare for taxi drivers. Tipping at hammams (Turkish baths) is customary; a minimum of 20 to 30 TL is typically required.
Tipping Guide for Istanbul:
- Restaurants: 10% is normal. Just round up if it’s casual.
- Taxis: Round up to the nearest 20 TL. At least.
- Hammams: Tip your attendant 40-50 TL (or more for luxury spas).
- Hotels: Bellhops and housekeepers: 40 TL per bag/cleaning is thoughtful.
- Cafes/street vendors: No tip required, but spare coins are welcome if service was extra friendly.
Don’t make a show of tipping. Locals usually leave it discreetly and move on.
12. Hospitality Is Real - But Don’t Be Naïve!
In Istanbul, people will go above and beyond to assist you. People will invite you to tea or walk you to your hotel. It's usually sincere. However, remain vigilant. Some overly amiable "guides" or store owners are attempting to persuade you to spend money or make purchases. Have faith in your instincts. If something doesn't feel right, gently say no and leave.
Final Thoughts: Be Curious, Be Respectful, Be Present
Those who observe more than they intend are rewarded in Istanbul. It's a city of contradictions: chaotic yet friendly, old and new. You are not intended to be constrained by the unspoken rules. They are there to help you experience the city as a visitor, not just a tourist.
So take a sip of your tea. If the cat allows it, give it a pet. Allow the ferry to arrive late. Istanbul wants you to follow its beat, not to impress you! (Top image source: Unsplash)
